A Jester of Justice
by AlphomegaMaster
Summary: Hero!Joker. After a fight with batman unlike any other, Joker is now completely sane! 18 months in Arkham later, he opens a gag shop in downtown Gotham. But soon after, criminals are showing up in front of GCPD literally wrapped up in a bow. Could it be? Is Joker really trying to be a hero? Please please PLEASE leave a review.
1. Chapter 1

It was just another night in Gotham. Batman had just foiled joker's latest plan, and now they were fighting on another rooftop. But tonight would be different. Tonight, the joker would be a villain no more!

* * *

 ** _In the mind of the Joker..._**

A man was chained up in a void, powerless to stop the Joker as he controlled his body, using it to fight Batman. "Why hasn't he figured it out yet?" asked the man. "He's the world's greatest detective, why hasn't he found the bombs yet?!"

"Oh, shut up Jack!" exclaimed the Joker as he backhanded his mental prisoner. "Nobody asked you anything! You're stuck here, locked away, the voice in my head who doesn't fit in!" He pulled a key out of his green hair. "And as long as I have this, you're NEVER getting out! Not in a MILLION, ZILLION-"

"LOOK OUT!"

"Huh?"

 ** _WHAM!_**

Batman had just delivered a finishing blow straight to Joker's forehead. The impact caused the void to shake, making the joker loose his grip on the key. "NOOO!" he exclaimed as the key flew through the air, and landed perfectly into the lock.

When the chains suddenly began to glow, Jack smiled for the first time in years. The shackles on his legs and arms came undone. "Hehehehehe." He chuckled. The collar around his neck popped right off "Hahahahahaha!" He laughed. Finally, the chains became weaker than tissue paper. With a single tug, Jack Napier destroyed every single link in his prison. "HAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He guffawed. Jack Napier was now free!

"No. NO! This isn't funny!" Screamed the Joker, backing away from the mental master. "THIS ISN'T FUNNY AT ALL!"

"Really? I think it's hilarious!"

"Get away from me!"

Jack grabbed Joker by the collar and stared deep into his fearful eyes. "Let's give the people of Gotham a hero they can laugh with!"

 ** _"NOOOO_ OOOOO**OOOOOOooooo..." The Joker turned into pure energy, and was absorbed by Jack.

A cocoon of energy surrounded Jack's mental avatar, which burst open almost the instant it completely covered his body. Standing in the average-looking man's place was a new Joker. A better Joker. A heroic joker. "Ya know what they say!" Said Joker in a peppy, upbeat voice. "If ya can't beat em', JOIN EM'!"

* * *

Joker woke up from his bed in Arkham with a jolt. He turned to the guard in front of his cell and wasted no time. "HEY! YOU! Did Batman find the bombs?!"

The guard was startled and choked on his coffee. "What? Oh. Yeah, he found your bombs right after he brought you here."

 _Oh thank god!_ thought Joker. _Now that that's taken care of, I need to get out of here. The right way._

* * *

 ** _18 months later..._**

"This is Viki Vale reporting live from outside Arkham asylum where, in a few minutes, Jack Napier, AKA: The Joker, is about to be released after being deemed sane by multiple tests, mental examinations, Arkham psychologists, and even Batman himself. The former Clown Prince of Crime has been in Arkham for a whopping 18 months without making any attempt to escape. Even when Lex Luthor staged an Arkham breakout just 6 months ago, multiple eyewitnesses and unedited security footage show the Jester of Genocide staying in his cell, despite the massive hole in his wall allowing him to escape at any time. Oh, here he comes now! Mr. Napier!"

Joker was stepping out of Arkham wearing his iconic purple suit and holding a suitcase. He was being escorted by Batman as protection against anyone who would try to kill him for what he did while he was insane. He saw Viki and made a beeline for her.

"Mr. Napier-"

Joker held a hand up to stop her. "Please Miss Vale. Mr. Napier was my father's name. Call me Joker."

"Alright Joker. Why do you insist on keeping your bleached skin and villain name? Hasn't Wayne Industries made multiple offers to pay for surgery that would restore your skin to normal?"

"Well, Viki, I'm trying to be a better man, and that means I need to admit the horrible things I've done. If I got the surgery, it would be like I'm trying to act like what I did never happened. I would much rather stand out, stand up, and say 'I know what I did, and I know it was wrong'."

"What will you do now since you are no longer the biggest villain in Gotham. No offense."

"None taken. There's an old pawn shop in downtown Gotham that I've always wanted to turn into a practical joke and gag shop, and Wayne Enterprises has generously given me the deed to the property as well as $50,000 to kick-start my business."

"Do you have anything to say about rumors that your gag store may be a front for you to make more of your toxic trick-weapons?"

"Yes I do. Batman and the GCPD will be installing very high security in my workshop as well as keeping a very close eye on my bank account, bills, purchases and location at all times."

"Why are you willing to give up your privacy so easily?"

"I'm an ex villain trying to be good, this is the only way they'd give me a chance. Any more questions?"

"Just one. What is your status with Harley Quinn?"

"I broke up with her. Convinced her that I wasn't good enough for her and told her to find someone who was. Don't worry, she's so much happier with Poison Ivy."

"Anything you'd like to declare?"

"I held a knife in each hand and I fell down the stairs, that's how I got them. I'm afraid that's all the time I have Miss Vale." Joker straightened his tie and walked to the batmobile, sitting in the passenger seat with Batman at the wheel. In less than a second, the caped crusaders' car was a mile away.

"That was Jack Napier, AKA: Joker, live from Arkham asylum. I'm Viki Vale. And now here's Jim with the weather."

* * *

 ** _In the batmobile..._**

"Hey Bruce, where's the radio on this thing?" asked Joker as he scanned the dashboard for anything that didn't look dangerous.

"I'm still not comfortable with you calling me that while I'm in the suit." Said Batman. He pressed a button and the radio turned on. "Remind me again how you found out my identity."

"Hehehe! I'm the only one who's gotten close enough to your exposed face enough times to memorize it. But I only figured it out when I went sane after you knocked my screws back in place. Ah, memories." Joker looked out his side of the batmobile. After a few seconds his eyes popped open. "WAITWAITWAITWAITWAIT! TURN AROUND!"

"What?"

 **"JUST DO IT!"**

With no hesitation, batman pulled a 180 and stopped where Joker's eyes went wide. The clown opened the door and jumped out. "This'll only take a second."

 ** _10 minutes later_**...

Joker got back in the batmobile frowning, covered in blood stains, feathers, silly putty, and a knife in his right arm, which was bending the wrong way. Several seconds of silence later, Batman opened his mouth to speak "ASHUSHUSHUSHUSH!" Joker waved his good hand in front of Batman. "This is my blood, they were bane's men, I used to store my joker venom here some- You know what? Just... just drive."

"Would you, uh... like a kids meal?"

"... Yes please."

"Siri, find the nearest Wendy's."


	2. Chapter 2

**_One month later..._**

Two robbers were in an alley in the run-down part of Gotham across from a jewelry store.

"You sure about this?"

"Joker ain't around no more, so we're on our own now."

"No, I mean are you sure Batman ain't gonna show up?"

"You kiddn' me?" The thug pulled out his phone to show his partner the live news of Batman, Red Hood, Nightwing, and Red Robin fighting a super-charged Bane on the other side of the city. "He's on the other side of town! Besides, who's gonna care about a few missing rocks when Bane is wreckin' the city?" He smiled, and his partner smiled back.

"Okay! Let's go nab some bling!"

Little did they realize that on the rooftops just above them, a figure was chuckling as it watched them break into the store.

* * *

"Thanks again Batman." Said commissioner Gordon as he shook Batman's hand.

"Just another night in Gotham, Jim." Said Red Hood. "With Bane back in Arkham, that just leaves the Riddler, Scarecrow, Mr. Freeze, Harley Quinn, and Poison Ivy on the loose."

"Commissioner! Batman!" Harvey Bullock got off the radio and ran over to the bat-family and Gordon. "That was the GCPD, we gotta get down there ASAP."

* * *

In front of the GCPD was a giant purple box tied up with a green bow and a note reading "HA HA HA!" and two Joker cards. as soon as the Bat-family exited the batmobile, a female officer gave them all the details.

"X-ray shows there are two people in there as well as a leaking gas canister, possibly Joker gas. Our bomb sniffing hounds haven't found anything, but we think it might be a trick. This is clearly the work of the Joker, that lunatic. He should never have been let out in the first place."

Batman held up a hand. "Not so fast officer, look at the cards." He pointed at the two playing cards on the box.

"We have. Both jokers. It's literally his calling card."

Red Hood spoke up. "Why don't you take a moment to think about what it means, lady? When has Joker ever left more than one card? It's never happened before! I think he's trying to tell us something."

"Like what?" asked Nightwing. "What could you possibly get from two cards?"

"OH! OH! I KNOW!" Red Robin exclaimed as he raised his hand. "He's saying that, uh, he's playing with a full deck!"

"Exactly." Batman said. He walked up to the box and activated his scanners. "What's more, if the canister did contain Joker gas, these people in the box as well as everyone around it would be suffocating from laughter. This gas appears to be an incapacitating agent sending the exposed into the REM stage. Analysis suggests it also triggers the body's ventromedial prefrontal cortex." He turned off his scanner and took off the lid of the box.

Red Robin blinked a few times. "What does that mean?"

As soon as batman put the lid on the ground, an adorable (and surprisingly not creepy) toy Joker head with a smile-shaped speaker in its mouth popped up along with some confetti. A music box started playing _pop goes the_ _weasel_ and the Joker toy began to sing in Joker's own voice.

 _"I call this stuff my 'Joker dream',_

 _It's my latest in-ven-tion,_

 _The bad guys have a silly dream,_

 _While they go to de-ten-tion!_

 _Hahaha!"_

"Oh! So it's like knockout gas mixed with the opposite of Scarecrow's fear gas?" Red Robin finally asked, feeling like he understood.

"It's exactly like that." Batman noticed a remote with a single button on it. Scanners showed that it was a remote for the Joker toy to play an audio file, perfectly safe. He pressed the button.

 _"You know what they say! If ya can't beat em, join em! You've met my top thugs Punch and Judy, but they're just the first present I have for the GCPD! There's a compartment in the hair of this toy that can be opened by pressing it's nose. Go ahead."_ Batman pressed the nose. " _B_ _oop! Ha ha!_ " The hair opened to reveal a flash drive in the compartment, which Batman immediately pulled out. " _On that flash drive are detailed instructions regarding the locations, locks, security, and booby traps of all my Joker gas hiding places! There's also information on how to make the neutralizing agent. You can do so much with this information! Paint a picture of it, take it to see a movie, teach it capitalism! You could even do something weird like going to all those locations knowing about all of the traps and obstacles so you can avoid them and neutralize the joker gas so it never gets into the wrong hands. You can even do that! It's okay, I don't judge. This message will self-destruct."_

"GET DOWN!" Yelled Gordon. Everyone immediately got down on the ground, all except for Batman.

" _FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE! **BOOM**! HA hahahhahahahhah! Oh my god! Ahahahha! I. I. I c-can't breathe! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay, I had my fun. Bye-bye!"_ The Joker head blew up with a loud **_SNAP_** but no explosion.

Several boxes of doughnuts were suddenly parachuted from the top of the GCPD. Everyone looked up to see Joker throw the last box of doughnuts down to them. "Sorry about that! In heinsight, it may have been a bad time to make a bomb joke since this is supposed to be my debut as a hero!"

Gordon yelled back up to Joker. "How long have you been up there?!"

"Well, today's Tuesday-"

"It's Friday!"

"..."

"..."

"I dunno, an hour?"

Gordon turned to Batman "Do we really have to work with him?"


	3. If all else fails, resort to slapstick

**_new year's eve, Gotham Concert Hall, 11:50_**

Joker is backstage, unbeknownst to the crowd of people attending the charity event. After all, the only way people would willingly see him on stage is if they didn't know he was going to be there. Right now, he's putting on makeup to make himself look more like a fun-loving clown and less like a sociopath circus freak while Harley is putting the finishing touches on his now neon-green hair. Suddenly, Red Robin peeks his head in the door. "Five minutes to showtime."

"cancel the show." Joker said shakily.

"What?"

" ** _I SAID CANCEL THE SHOW!_** I can't do this man! They're still gonna hate me!"

"Uh, Joker?"

"They're gonna boo me off the stage, or worse, throw tomatoes and eggs at me! I can't have that, I'm tomato intolerant!"

"Ahem. Joker?

"They're never gonna believe me, they'll just think it's another act, a mask of comedy! **_IF ONLY THEY COULD SEE MY TRAGEDY!_** "

SLAP!*

"SNAP OUT OF IT JACK!" Harley said as she put her glove back on.

"B-b-b-but I'm not Jack, I'm Joker." he rubbed his cheek where his ex had slapped him.

"Ha! That's soooo funny. You may not be The Joker I knew, but you sure ain't the Joker I know now!"

Joker got back up on his feet "W-what are you-"

"My Joker that I know would never be worried about whether or not people believe him. You're a clown! You're not supposed to be taken seriously!"

"Well-"

"You've gotten this far, and now you're gonna go out there and show the world that Joker is a changed man!"

"No way! I don't wanna go out there!"

Robin finally spoke up "He doesn't wanna go."

"But he does!"

"I don't!

"You do!"

"I don't!"

"You do!"

"I don't!"

"You do!"

"I don't!"

"You... don't!"

"I do!"

"You don't!"

"I do!"

"You don't!"

Joker leaps onto the coffee table next to him and points at Harley with a triumphant smile "Listen here, QUINN! Nobody tells Joker what he can and can't do! Cause when I say I do it means I do!" He leaps off the table and tosses the swivel chair in front of the mirror to the side " **YEET!** " as he puts on his bright red lipstick over his blood crimson scar. "So I'm gonna go out there," He pulls open his lavender tux with the long entrails and rips off his black tie, replacing it with a large, wide, green tie with the words 'Ha' all over it that covers the front of his orange vest. ", And show the whole world that Joker is a hero! And there's nothing you can... do to... stop... me... I fell for the Rodger Rabbit trick, didn't I?"

"Yep."

"Not the first time?"

"Nnnnope!"

"Not the last?"

"Hahaha! That's for sure!"

"Okay! Now that I'm more confident, let's make em' laugh!"

* * *

"Ladies and Gentlemen." Commissioner Gordon spoke into the mike while the previous band was removing everything off the stage. "It is nearly five 'till midnight, and in a few minutes our special guest performer will come out and help us welcome the new year. But first, I need to do something about a few rumors that I have heard roaming around the theater during intermission. Apparently, some of you think Joker is in the building with the intent to crash the party. Let me put those rumors to rest..." Comm. Gordon pulls out his walkie-talkie. "He's our guest performer. GO GO GO!" He exclaimed into the radio.

Immediately, several police snipers burst through the doors and took aim at the stage. "Now, before you panic, he insisted that we have our best snipers trained on his position at all times during his performance. He claims he works better under pressure, just ask Atlantis on open mic-night." the audience chuckled at that. "He begged me to say that. As for what his performance is, we have another special guest tonight, Batman!" He gestured to the open skylight on the roof of the building as Batman leaped down from the batwing and into a reserved seat in the front row. He was met with a solid ten seconds of thunderous applause "Way to make an entrance buddy. Now currently, Joker is running a prank shop in old-town Gotham. His challenge is this; If he can make Batman laugh, chuckle, or even smile before midnight, he will donate 90% of all his profits in 2019 to the 'Make-A-Wish' Foundation. So without further adeu, Joker." He walked off stage to the sound of absolutely nothing.

Then, the instruments started to kick in as Joker rolled on-stage on a segway and started to sing and dance.

 _I've got to look my best tonight,_

 _To show all of these Gothamites,_

 _That I'm an okay person underneath all that paint._

 _And though my jolly scars will say_

 _That I should just be locked away._

 _Before you charge the chair let me show you I can change!_

 _We'll try a tie, of orange, green, or yellow_

 _Or a rose for show, that squirts a funny fellow_

 _With some streaks of pink, upon my lavender tuxedo._

 _Come on, Batman, let's see a smile!_

 _I know you just can't wait to stare_

 _At all my wild, lime green hair._

 _But listen to the thing I have to say!_

 _I'm a clown and I'm a debtor,_

 _But I'm getting so much better_

 _Laughing every day._

 _My crimes included homicide._

 _I've stolen, cheated, killed and lied_

 _And how could I forget the time I blew up that school?_

 _Or when I murdered on TV,_

 _This really isn't helping me._

 _The point is that I am no longer that fatal fool._

 _A squirt, a spurt_

 _To show I'm not the villain_

 _You'll give thanks, for pranks_

 _That aren't literally killin'_

 _And so from, now on_

 _The only blood that I'll be spillin'_

 _Will be from when you split your sides_

 _My sanity's been certified_

 _By quacks and shrinks from far and wide,_

 _They've tested me in every single way,_

 _Laughter's the best medicine_

 _I should know, because I've been_

 _Laughing every day._

 _I realize I'm the Joker._

 _The ex clown prince of crime._

 _There's not a single sin that I can hide._

 _But you stood right beside me,_

 _When I started acting nicely,_

 _Since you bopped me in the chin_

 _Putting all my screws back in,_

 _Now I'm finally gonna win_

 _Because I'm on your side!_

During the tap-dancing segment, Harley Quinn, Red Robin, Nightwing, and Red Hood came out in their full costumes and top hats and began dancing a very well-choreographed tap with Joker. This was leaving the audience in stitches and even Batman was struggling to not smile.

 _I swear that I'll make Gotham's Knight,_

 _Chuckle, grin, or laugh tonight!_

 _Before the stroke of twelve, I'll find a way!_

 _But thanks to you, I'm feeling better,_

 _Out of that restraining sweater._

 _Most of you may think I'm lying,_

 _If I were, you'd all be dying._

 _I just want Gotham to smile,_

 _Even killer crocodile._

 _Villain joker's gone away,_

 _Hero joker's here to stay,_

 _I am running out of time,_

 _and I'm all out of silly rhymes,_

 _La la la la, la la la la_

 _I regret skipping rehearsal,_

 _I've gone from insane to daffy,_

 _All of this,_ _BECAUSE I'M LAUGHIIIIIIIIIIIIII-_

 _1 minute later_

 _-IIIIIIIIIIIING_ _.._

 _EVERY DING-DONG DAAAAAAAAAAAAY!_

The Audience stood up and gave Joker a standing ovation, at least those who could stand up without hurting their bellies after laughing so hard. Joker looked around the theater and, for the first time in a long time, took a bow to a non-captive audience. He quickly turned to Batman but frowned when he saw that he still wasn't smiling.

"OH COME ON!" He exclaimed. causing the audience to abruptly stop. "You seriously didn't find that funny?! You really are hopeless! I give up! What do you want me to do? Drop a piano on my head?"

Then a piano dropped on Joker.

 ** _*DUNNNN*_**

"Hehe." Batman laughed before immediately covering his mouth.

Joker popped up from the piano wreckage all dazed and bruised, but managed to scream out " ** _IF ALL ELSE FAILS, RESORT TO SLAPSTICK! GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!_** " Before passing out.

* * *

 **Gotham hospital, 2 days later**

"Ugh... my head... ow." Joker sat up on the hospital bed. "That was not a pleasant experience." He looked around and saw a little boy next to him. "Uh... Am I dead? Is this heaven? Why am I here? Did I kill you at one point? I think I did, I don't forget a face. By the way, who's the ugly dude in the other bed." He said, pointing towards a mirror.

"I'm Mike. I wanted to say thanks for saving me and my mommy a long time ago."

Joker rubbed his head for a moment as he recalled. "Ohhh... Now I remember you! You're the first person I saved!"

"I drew a picture about it! I made it for you!" He handed Joker a drawing of him punching a mugger while Mike was with his mother behind him. It was all in crayon, and there were a few scribbles outside the lines, but it was really good for a little kid's drawing.

"Wow. This is actually really good. Your mom and dad must be so proud!"

"Oh..." Mike looked down at his feet "I don't have a dad."

"Huh?"

"I never knew him."

"Aw... Well he's missing out on his son's artistic childhood." He ruffled the little kid's hair. Mike laughed a bit. "What did you say your name was?"

"Mike. Mike Napier."

"Well mike, your dad may not be here, but someday, you're gonna be big and famous and he'll see you on TV and say- Wait, DID YOU SAY NAPIER?!"

* * *

Joker kicked open the door and saw a woman sitting on the chairs in front of them "JEANNIE?!"

The woman stood up. "Jack?!"

"I thought you were dead!"

"I thought you were too!"

"So that's my son?!"

"Yes! Yes! That's our son Jack!"

"I'M A FATHER!"

"Oh Jack!" Jeannie ran up to her husband and gave him a big hug as his laugh of joy turned to tears.

"I'm a father! I'm a... I'm a father! Ahahahahah... I'm... and I... I wasn't there."

"Shhh, shhh, it's okay. What matters is that you're here for him now."

"Mike... I like that name." Joker ended the hug and looked at his wife. She looked really different from when he last saw her (Probably from plastic surgery to protect her from the mafia), but he looked into her emerald eyes and knew that this was the woman he loved all those years ago. Then he noticed that she was holding back a laugh. He couldn't help but chuckle at that. "What? What's so funny?"

"Are yo- are you wearing mascara?" She stifled a laugh as she pulled out a mirror from her purse.

Joker couldn't help but laugh at the sight if neon green mascara running down his cheeks. "HAHAHA! I forgot I had that! Wait, i think you forgot to put on lipstick."

Jeannie put her hands to her lips. "Oh, OH. You'r right. I forgot."

"I can fix that." Joker kissed his wife straight on the lips. " ** _MWAH!_** That's better! Hey, Candy apple looks good on you."

"Oh stop. You're such a Joker."

"Gasp! (Yes he _said_ gasp) Doth my ears deceive me? Was that a joke?"

"I dunno. What do you think?" She said with a smirk.

"You wanna know what I think?" Joker put his arm around her. "I think that from this point on, things are going to go right." He kissed his wife once more.

Normally, when someone says that, things go horribly wrong. But in this case he was right, things were only going to get better from there.


End file.
